Some things not to say to the nice staff at the pet boutique

1. "My vet gave me a list of foods to choose from, but I didn't bring it with me."

2. "My dog (insert undesirable behavior here). Do you have like a spray or something to stop that?" No, and we don't have a spray to stop your baby from crying, either.

3. "I know your return policy is that I can't return clothes and that I have to return things within ten days, but can I return this dog coat that I bought a month ago?"

Also, when I ask you if you're changing foods to solve a particular problem, don't say "No," and then after I give you five minutes of information and we've almost made a choice, say "Will that one be good if (insert particular problem here)? because that's why we want to change foods."

Thanks.